Five good things about the Chick-Fil-A controversy
3. McDonald's is probably selling more McChicken sandwiches
Who benefits most from Chick's anti-gay stance? McDonald's execs are probably doing naked, drunken chicken dances in vats of hot mustard and sweet & sour sauces in the boardroom of corporate headquarters right now, because fewer people chowing at Chick's means that more customers will be pecking at McChicken sandwiches for protest and normal everyday gluttony reasons. And I would wager my forcing down one of McDoo's inedible salads that no one from its PR department will -- in the foreseeable future -- come out publically on either side of the gay marriage issue. McDoo's brass is collectively savvy, and will gladly take anyone's money at any time, f*ggy or otherwise, and gleefully gawk at the Chick-Fil-A schadenfreude-fodder without so much as a squawk.
2. Folks on Facebook have something to distract them from Kristin Stewart
When I heard that Kristin Stewart had cheated on Robert Pattinson, I cried myself to sleep, and couldn't overcome my depression long enough to eat or bathe myself. I am sincerely thanking whatever god that Dan Cathy prays to, or at, for sending Chick-Fil-A's oral-moral dilemma in time to save me -- and everyone else on Facebook -- from having to wallow in the pain of Bella tiring of Edward's glitter-hands being knuckle-deep in her gizzards.