Kiss my cheese grits! Is the Waffle House affected by the CEO sex scandal?

J. Wohletz
It's good to see this place never changes.
As I expected, my order was done in under ten minutes and I got my first plate: piled with a fat, flat-grilled chicken breast filet, two perfectly done sunny-side up eggs, grits swimming in melted butter and tagged on the edges with not-really-melted processed cheese slices. The best part of ordering sunny-side up eggs is being able to dip toast triangles in the yellow dippy goo, but it also worked well with the grits. The chicken was juicy but under-seasoned, so I soon turned my attention to the piping-hot waffle plopped down in front of me.

Waffle House can make a waffle.

This one was thick, moist, not too sweet, and had ribbons of pumpkin spice batter running through it; it didn't need butter or syrup -- the sign of an exceptional waffle. I was already nearing a state of full when the mega-turbo-gut-killer hash browns arrived.

J. Wohletz
Just look at the not-really-melted cheesy goodness!
These hash browns were a thing of beauty: a mountainous pile of fried potato, more processed cheese, barely-heated canned mushrooms, lightly sautéed onion dices, overripe tomato chunks, vinegary pickled jalapenos, hunks of salty seared ham, and whirls of milk-white, well-peppered country sausage gravy -- and then the whole spectacular mound was buried under a volcanic layer of chili, the kind with meat and beans.

I shoveled, scooped, scraped and crammed as much as I could, and still had to take half the order home. These hash browns were everything I thought they'd be -- and more. When you are small on cash, big on hungry and/or drunk as fuck, these are what you need.

I paid my reasonable tab and was thankful that I'd decided to revisit my old stompin' ground. Visiting a Waffle House is like peering at a trailer-park Norman Rockwell painting; it's about as unaffected a greasy spoon stop as you can find. And it deserves better than it's former CEO's tawdry sex scandal.

Thank goodness the hash browns remain untainted.

Location Info

Cafe Crescendo

2190 S. Delaware St., Denver, CO

Category: Restaurant

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