Five Recent Food Developments That Probably Won't Work

Food companies pair creativity with marketability -- along with a little luck -- to score "the next big thing" in food trends. There are some amazing ideas for new foods and drinks out there, but at the same time, some new products never really take off. Some aren't appealing to consumers, aren't interesting, or miss the mark for trends, but most are just plain not very good. Last week's golden child, Philadelphia bacon cream cheese, is probably one of the best "why did we not have this already?" new foods. Pepsi's intro of a back-to-basics craft soda, on the other hand, will probably turn out to be less popular than Crystal Pepsi (although if they up the kola nut extract, that would help in niche markets).

Here's a list of five recent food developments that probably won't work. Among the soon-to-be-gone new ideas are hangover-flavored pie, a fizzy granola bar, something about David Hasselhoff, and fake meat blood for vegans.

See also: Five of the Best -- and Worst -- New Halloween Treats for 2014

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Five of the Best -- and Worst -- New Halloween Treats for 2014

Halloween season means we get homemade orange-iced cupcakes with too much icing, black ginger ale punch full of sodden gummy worms, and those little rolled fondant ghosts that somebody's auntie made by hand that everyone compliments but nobody actually eats. The store-bought treats usually end up being a slightly better mixed bag of either spectacularly good or hauntingly bad, and this year is no exception.

Here's a list of the Top Five Best and Worst New Halloween Treats for 2014. Prep yourselves for cheesy skeletons, the scariest milk in the known universe, and more candy corn things than should be allowed by law.

See also: Top Ten Grossest Halloween Party Foods

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At $21 a Pound, Roasted Hemp Seeds Look Like a Cash Cow

These are for eating, not for planting (and then smoking).
Hemp seeds have started infiltrating grocery-store shelves across America. They're often sold shelled and in bulk quantities, but some producers have also been packaging them as snack items. Roasted and seasoned, they're fine snacks -- they taste nothing like pot and don't get you high, but they're high in protein (nine grams in three tablespoons) and full of omega essential fatty acids.

But when we saw a bag of Ziggy Marley Hemp Rules -- seeds that are USDA certified organic -- selling for $7.99 for six ounces (before tax), we started considering the potential of hemp seeds as a cash crop.

See also: Five of the Best -- and Worst -- Pumpkin Spice Foods This Year

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Five of the Best -- and Worst -- Pumpkin Spice Foods This Year


Pumpkin spice season gets earlier and earlier every year, much like the Xmas shopping holiday, and somewhere around mid-August the traditional pumpkin spice goodies appeared on shelves. The beloved PSLs have been shooting through Starbucks drive-throughs like nutmeg-scented balls from a seasonal-favorites cannon. Sadly, the pumpkin spice condoms, tampons, toilet paper and Doritos are all hilarious online hoaxes, but rest assured the pumpkin-spice Oreos are all-too-real. This year's crop of pumpkin spice snacks has turned up some new faves and a few questionable choices, but one thing's for certain: pumpkin-spicing everything ain't going away until at least December.

Here's a list of five of the best -- and worst -- pumpkin spice things this year.

See also: Five reasons why people go out of their gourd over pumpkin-flavored things

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Aurora's Josh Bayne Forages for Food on Fat Guys in the Woods

The Weather Channel
The Weather Channel, like cable companions TLC (which apparently was once focused on learning), the History Channel and NatGeo (because National Geographic didn't sound cool enough for the kids), has evolved from strictly education and information to entertainment. The Weather Channel's fall schedule includes a "survival" show called Fat Guys in the Woods -- and Sunday's episode will feature Aurora resident Josh Bayne.

See also: Acorn and Oak at Fourteenth chef Steve Redzikowski: "Food TV Is the Biggest Downfall of Our Industry

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Telluride Mushroom Festival's Long, Strange Trip to This Weekend's 33rd Fest

Telluride Mushroom Festival
Many folks who hear about the Telluride Mushroom Festival wonder whether it focuses on mushrooms for eating, or mushrooms for, you know, seeing Pocahontas riding a dragon and stuff. The confusion is reasonable, considering fungi's dual history as both a food and as a catalyst for vision quests.

See also:'s Top Eleven Culinary Adventures in the State

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Tonight only: Camel meat tacos at Los Chingones

Thumbnail image for cameltaco.jpg
Lori Midson
One hump or two?

The meat in the taco snap above? Camel. And, why not? According to, the camel, "dubbed the 'ship of the desert,' occupies a significant place in the culture of the Arabian Peninsula." In fact, the story continues, in the United Arab Emirate, there are "camel races, camel beauty contests and competitions for the tastiest camel cuisine."

And now -- tonight only -- you can eat camel tacos at Los Chingones, Troy Guard's edgy shrine to tacos on Upper Larimer.

See also: Los Chingones's Lou Ortiz on the python tacos that could soon slither on the menu

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Photos: Twelve Denver Bronco culinary masterpieces for Super Bowl Sunday


Super Bowl Sunday is the second largest calorie-consuming holiday of the year after Thanksgiving, but while Thanksgiving is all about the turkey and mashed potatoes, Super Bowl Sunday, at least in Denver, is all about the celebration of the orange-and-blue. We've gotten a full crush of press releases trying to sell us on boring Super Bowl snacks , but we're committed to a blowout, and the photos on the following pages -- some of the most creative and crazy Denver Bronco culinary creations we could find -- are spectacular marvels of Bronco mania. From breast-baring cakes and pancakes to pizza and popcorn, these concoctions, some of which were made locally, sink Seattle's ass.

See also: Photos: Ten epic Super Bowl meat stadiums

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Denver Museum of Nature and Science on the hunt for a sixth taste sense

All photos courtesy of Genetics of Taste website
Do you see dead people? Well, too bad. That's not the sixth sense that the Denver Museum of Nature and Science is looking for. The museum's Genetics of Taste Lab has partnered with Purdue University on a new community study to identify a sixth taste in the human spectrum: sweet, sour, salty, savory, bitter...and soon-to-be something else.

See also: Sneak peak of Mythbusters: The Explosive Exhibition, at the Denver Museum of Nature and Science

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The twenty goriest and most gruesome Halloween cakes (and one very disturbing baby cake video)


There's gross -- and there's gross anatomy, the deeply gruesome and gory body parts that hit the table on Halloween, the one day of the year when demonic bakers emerge from their caldrons and devise recipes that make your stomach turn green. The cakes on the following pages, all allegedly edible, are not of the candy corn type. No, these are the twisted works of deranged minds, the kind who find morbid fun in making sure that the rest of us have reoccurring nightmares, even after the haunted houses have retired to the grave. These cakes are proof that bakers aren't afraid to glorify the creep factor. And the there's Dan Gentle, a cake designer who created the "baby cake" -- a cake that may very well be one of the most disturbingly good-in-all-the-wrong-ways works of diabolical art you've ever seen. Proceed with caution when you flip the page.

See also: Seven celebrity chefs who would make great zombies

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