Kate Moss Flops for Topshop

This is the capstone of Kate's collection. Collective disappointment ensues.

Cat’s apparently been napping this week, as she missed the big launch of Kate Moss’s new line for British Topshop. Yep, the girl who defines heroin chic – even after rehab for coke – now has her own collection. She joins the ranks of such luminaries as J.Simp, Madonna (whose effort for H&M was no Immaculate Collection, though Cat would love to see the cheap Swedish retailer come to Denver), Sarah Jessica Parker and others trying to extend their “brand.”

View the entire collection.

The difference with Kate’s designer turn? She modeled all of her pieces on things already hanging in her closet. Now you, too, can be Kate. Um, yeah, don’t we all wish. Seriously, nobody can be Kate. Kate can hardly be Kate anymore, though Cat will fully admit that she’s looking better than she has in years, all glowy and happy and thin as opposed to emaciated, pasty and sullen.

Don’t expect to stock up on your new Kate-but-not-Kate look, however: Stateside the pieces are only available at Barney’s New York or online, and quantities are limited. Here’s the firm warning from the Topshop site:

Due to considerable demand for this collection, and to be fair to all our customers, you will only be able to buy 1 of each style and can buy no more than five items at a time. So choose wisely.

Kate in her "short dress with neck detail.

Damn, you’d think this some earth quaking decision, not whether to buy the $24 tank (basic and nothing special) or the $120 “short dress with neck detail” (basic and nothing special -- and that neckline was done ten-fold better by Mona Lucero for the Tamarac Square Fashion Project). Per Racked, only about forty people were lined up outside the Barney’s co-op and 100 people outside the main Barney’s further uptown. “At 11am, they raised the gate and all 40 plus of us filed inside, unaware of the disappointment that would soon follow.” By noon, the excitement was over. So much for the “considerable demand.”

Wouldn’t matter to those of us here in fly-over country, anyway. We can’t actually score any of the (very few) cute looks: No, those aren’t available online from Topshop, and Barney’s is only featuring one tank top on its site.

Guess we can’t all be Kate after all.

Kate Moss preparing for the big debut.

People in line waiting for Barney's to open.