I read this Rolling Stone article a few weeks back and I was appalled. I actually wrote a poem about it. I would love to send it to Nate. Do you know of how to get a mailing address for him?

have you looked up the prison that he is currently in. his # is right on his shirt that he is wearing in the picture.i am searching also!!!!!!!!!

I just finished that rolling stone article. As I read it I just became more and more upset as the story unfolded. The trial was a joke and I can't believe what he endured. I think the murder was his last option, he had no choice. He searched everywhere for help. I can't imagine how hopeless he felt. If anyone figures out how to get a hold of him, please let me know.

What I find amazing is that the state has no money nor resources to help Nate when he ASKS for it, but they have all the money in the world to incarcerate him for the rest of his life! What kind of double standard is that, or is that because prisons are "big business" now?

Please keep in mind that just because something is reported in a national publication does not make it true - let me tell you a little about my friends - Julie & Roger Ybanez.

I was friends with Julie & Roger Ybanez. My husband and I met Julie, Roger and Nathan in 1982. We lived in Europe at the same time and ended up working for the same company. Julie & Roger were our best friends during the 4 years we were there. After we all returned to the states we continued our friendship. They were visiting us in Colorado the night my husband proposed in 1988. Later they moved to Va. Beach, at my urging, because we had settled there. They later left Va. to pursue their dream of business ownership in Omaha. When that dream failed they settled in Colorado so that Roger could go back to work with our old insurance company. All the while we continued our friendship via visits and long talks on the phone during which we shared many of our most intimate joys and heartaches. I last talked to Julie about a month before her death. I feel that I knew Julie -and that the Julie that is being portrayed in the recent articles and on TV is not the real Julie Ybanez. She can't defend herself, so I will defend her.

Julie was a Christian - certainly. She was not some out of control type of zealot. But she did believe strongly in Christ. She loved her son and always tried to balance her own beliefs with the realities of a child's desire to participate, for example, in Trick-or-Treat activities or listening to rock music. Even during our last conversation the topics included the trials of maintaining balance and fairness with regard to Nathan. She wanted him to be able to do regular teenage stuff -- but to not go to the extremes and ignore their Christian faith or engage in dangerous activities.

As for the Ybanez family being reclusive or extremely private or that Roger was some tyrant. Again, I believe they are being unfairly portrayed. From the time I met them I was in awe of their ability to make so many friends wherever they were. My husband was initially a business competitor of theirs in Europe. Despite the fact that we worked for different companies they reached out to us when we were all alone in a strange country and became our best friends. Both Roger and Julie were social and a lot of fun to be around. They were easy going with each other and there was never even a hint of anger or disputes with others. We were at their home constantly. There was always good natured banter between family members. As for them being so private -- we all discussed every aspect of our various lives: successes, failures, heartbreaks, finances, children, & our hopes for the future. The description of the Ybanez's that is being presented now by Nathan or by people who met them the last year of Julie's life is not a fair portrayal of them. Granted those people met Roger and Julie at the most difficult time in their lives - business failure, failure of a marriage, a troubled teen. Their only experiences with Roger and Julie are during a time of immense duress and I can understand how that would color their perceptions of them.

With regard to Nathan's portrayal of his mother as a sexual abuser, I will never, ever, believe that the kind, compassionate, friendly, and devoted Christian woman that I knew would ever sexually abuse her son. Julie loved and cared for her son. She wanted the best for him. They may have had failures to communicate during the teenage years and differences of opinion - but Julie was no sexual deviant. As for Roger, I never felt that there was ever even a hint that he would be a threat to child. He was always welcome in my home and I have children. I fail to understand why anyone else can't see that Nathan needs to blame and demonize Julie in order to try and obtain his freedom..

In the various articles it appears that the fact that the Ybanez family moved a lot is somehow supposed to have played a part in Nathan's supposed "abuse" at the hands of his parents. Many military families move countless times during their careers and yet Nathan gets to imply that the "blur" of neighborhoods and schools was something so negative. I moved quite a bit during my childhood/teen years, both during my father's career in the Air Force and as a teenager when we moved because he changed careers several times. I may not have liked it at the time but it was not abusive. We moved because my parents wanted a better life for their children. One article even states that the family moved or had 30 addresses in 15 years. And that they lived in cheap hotels in VA. Well, I know that they lived in 1 home in Europe for the 4 years we lived there. I also visited the two homes they rented in VA and they were both quite nice. For that matter, they stayed with me in my home for free – why would they have needed a cheap hotel?

The last time that I actually saw Nathan with his parents was in Virginia Beach, VA, not too long before they moved to Omaha. We were at their apt.- just as a casual drop in. Nathan was relaxed and joking with his parents. I don't honestly remember what activities Roger and Nathan were discussing -- BUT I do remember that part of the afternoon gab session involved the two of them telling us about some of the father-son stuff that they had been doing lately.

In the interests of fairness let me state that I had not visited with Julie in person since she moved away from Virginia Beach. But I do know that for her to have become the monster that Nathan describes is completely out of character for her. It's just so far removed from the person that I knew so well that it astounds me. As for the psychologists and social workers who "back up" Nathan's claims of sexual abuse by his parents I believe that they may be well intentioned but they are contributing to "blame the parents & fault the victim" attitude that is so pervasive nowadays. While there may indeed be real cases where such awful abuse occurred in other families I want people to know that I am appalled that Julie's character would be so cruelly violated.

Some may argue that the sentence that Nathan received was too harsh and perhaps that is the case. But, my concern is not for Nathan, my concern is for my dead friend who is being portrayed as a true villain. I can only imagine that Nathan might feel that he has to create the image of some evil Julie to justify his crime if he believes that, in so doing, he gives himself the one chance that he needs to get out of prison. But by vilifying his mother he is committing yet another murder, the murder of Julie's character and good name.

hey Jaclyn Harrell...in response

lots of people will tell you that my father is the nicest, funniest guy they know. i cant tell you how many times i have heard how lucky i am to have him.

he's a drunken, abusive piece of shit.
a liar.

i don't care how long or well you think you know someone...people who are abusive don't show it to the world. You probably know as much about what went on in that house as i do. also, being a bible wielding fanatic doesn't mean a person is a saint. consider the possibility that they are judgmental tyrants hiding behind jesus...
try reading a book (other than the bible...psych 101 perhaps?)
oh, and fuck yourself.

I second that last comment. Often times the most abusive homes are not obvious to those around them. My father was the same, a very charismatic and friendly man, but also an abusive alcoholic. And if you look at stories about young children (such as the infamous Jeanie for instance) often the neighbors of such families were close friends with the family for a decade or more with no idea what was happening inside a home.

Not to mention that the friends of every serial killer or rapist always say: he was always so nice! I never would have suspected he could do such a thing!

Your Julie and Roger may or may not have committed the offenses listed in the RS article and other publications, I am neither Judge nor jury. But Nate was not given a fair trial, and in the end it is truth and justice that we should seek, not protecting the image of a dead friend.

If this act was self defense the world certainly is a twisted place. Nathan is my cousin and Julie Ybanez was my aunt. The devastating murder killed not only Julie but my grandmother as well. She never recovered from the nightmare of losing her youngest daughter and her youngest grandchild (Nathan). My mother, Julie's sister, has tried over the years to correspond with Nathan but her life will never be the same. She knew Julie probably better than anyone else in the world and the allegations of sexual abuse...people are capable of horrible things but I cannot believe this to be true. It is sadly common these days to allegate sexual abuse in matters such as these. In the small chance it may be true, all I can say is it is still not a justification for such a sick and violent murder.
Nathan states there was 'no way out' when in reality Julie was planning on taking him to military school. Far away from her.
Whether Nathan stays in prison or is set free he will be living in his own personal hell for the rest of his life for what he did, regardless of the reasons.

WELL I THINK THAT NATHAN HAD ALL THE RITE TO KILL HIS MOTHER WELL NOT REALLY BUT TO HURT HER YES I UNDERSTAND HIM COMPLETELY IS NOT FAIR THAT WE KIDS BEING ABUSED CANT DO NOTHING ABOUT US BEING ABUSE AND THEY SAY WE ARE JUST COLD HEARTED NO WE ARE NOT BUT I THINK I UNDERSTAND HIM COMPLETELY AND ERIK IS A GREAT FRIEND I KNOW DEEP DOWN NO FREINDS WOULD STICK UP FOR SOME ONE WHO COMMITS MURDER ITS SAD THAT WE DONT HAE TRUE FRIENDS ITS SAD THAT WE CANT HAVE ARE FREEDOM AS WELL AS ADULTS BUT I UNTERSTAND WAT NATHAN IS GOING THROUGH

Jaclyn you may be shocked but how do you explain the scars on the kids back??

Jaclyn you may be shocked but how do you explain the scars on the kids back??