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Good News, DNC Hookers! Viagra Helps Prevent Altitude Sickness

Categories: News
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When the National Anthem is played, be sure to stand erect.

The dailies' desperation to find new angles on the Democratic National Convention is already at a crisis level. A case in point is "Into Thin Air: DNC Visitors May Huff, Puff," published in the August 8 Denver Post. This jumbo spread -- which receives page-one play, astonishingly enough -- is based entirely on the fact that (wait for it) there's 17 percent less oxygen in Mile High City air than the stuff at sea level.

News flash: Locals know this already, and most of us come to regard the subject as an irritating cliché by about age three. Besides, we're not the people who need the advice encapsulated in a sidebar about how to prevent and manage high-altitude sickness -- unless, that is, the Post is hoping to deputize its entire readership to sweep the area during the DNC in search of visitors who look a little faint. And yet, toward the end of her article, reporter Nancy Lofholm includes one snippet of interesting information -- one sure to hearten prostitutes hoping to cash in on the convention: People unaccustomed to the conditions here may feel better if they take Viagra.

Cha-ching!

Here's Lofholm's explanation: "Erectile-disfunction drugs such as Viagra and Cialis help those going to very high altitudes by relaxing blood vessels and increasing the amount of oxygen to muscles."

Yeah, one muscle in particular -- and that could result in a boom (and lots of bangs) for those in the most personal end of the service industry. After all, men who gobble Viagra and Cialis to help with their breathing are likely to experience a certain side effect that only a companion for hire will be able to relieve. And relieve. And relieve again for four solid (really solid) days.

In the end, then, the Post's article appeals to very different audiences. It'll bore the average Denverite to tears -- but hookers should find it fascinating. -- Michael Roberts


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3 comments
Cialis
Cialis

Thanks for such a valuable post. I was searching for the Cialis on the same topic and now I am here. So much information, really well executed blog.

Casino
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The New Dress summary and study guide, with notes, essays, quotes, and pictures.

D Smith
D Smith

So fabulous, glad you guys got your story on hookers, the Metzger non-Madam just couldn't provide, but as I see it, now you just have a bunch of politico's walking around blowing hot air and sporting boners! Should be a fun couple of days!

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