Top five explanations for why an elk wound up with a barstool around its neck
In case you missed it, the Vail Daily reported on February 13 that several Eagle-area residents have seen a female elk wandering around with a bar stool stuck on her head. But -- extra, extra! -- there's an update. The elk has been photographed wearing the bar stool like a giant, awkward necklace. Check out a series of images captured by Carrie Rousseau after the jump.
"She's very active," Colorado Division of Wildlife Officer Craig Wescoatt told the Vail Daily. "The bar stool doesn't seem to be impairing her to any great degree. She just looks kind of goofy."
According to the newspaper, residents say the elk may have picked up the stool after visiting the Brush Creek Saloon or the Dusty Boot Saloon. In the spirit of guessing-at-things-only-an-elk-and-a-bar-stool-could-possibly-know-for-sure, we're offering five explanations of our own.
1. The elk is a zombie. Before she was wandering around near Highway 6 with a bar stool dangling from her neck, she was stuffed and hanging on a wall in, say, the Dusty Boot Saloon. One night, after several Jager bombs and some good, old-fashioned voodoo, the elk became reanimated. Leaping from her perch above the pool table, she crashed to the ground and stumbled head-first into a bar stool before high-tailing it out of there in search of some native grasses to eat.
2. The elk lost a bet. "No way is Elton John's film company making a movie called Pride and Predator that stars a seven-foot extraterrestrial wreaking havoc on Jane Austen-era England," the elk was overheard saying to her friend as they munched in a meadow. "Way," the friend said. Turns out the elk was wrong. As the loser of the bet, she had to wear a bar stool on her head long enough for the stupid humans to take pictures and post them on the Internet.
3. The elk is a victim of peer pressure. Apparently, it's pretty common for elk -- and other antlered animals -- to get stuff stuck on their heads: lawn chairs, buckets, those skivvies you hung on the clothesline to dry. Maybe the elk didn't want to be left out of the in-crowd. "But Mooooom, all the other elk are doing it! Plus, there's so many worse things I could be doing! It's not like I'm hanging out by the highway during my estrus or anything. GOD!"
4. The elk is pledging Alpha Gamma Delta. Given a choice between the paddle and the bar stool, she chose the bar stool.
5. The elk is trying to drum up business for her new website, StuffOnMyElk.com. Inspired by the wild success of StuffOnMyCat.com, the elk decided to try her hand at creating the next big adorable-animal Internet sensation. And her publicity stunt is working! There's buzz all over the web. Just check out this comment from someone calling themselves "Trteamer:" "Give me a permit and a 30.06 and I'll get that bar stool back. I could use it by my BBQ."