Today's featured events: School is back in session at Buntport Theater

It'll be the ultimate back-to-school practice run at Buntport Theater's quarterly Teacher's Pet event tonight, wherein ten volunteers, the first to sign up, get up on stage for five minutes to show and tell on a chosen theme. That would be Back to School (Things I Wish I Hadn't Learned) this time around, and the rules of interpretation are pretty much anything goes. Dancing, singing, storytelling, standup: It's all fair game at this joyful twist on the classic open-mike night. Buntporters Brian Colonna and Erin Rollman host, while the audience picks the winning "teacher's pet," and contestants who overrun the five-minute limit get the hook from the Hall Monitor.

Sign up begins at 7:30 p.m. for the 8 p.m. performances; admission, determined by a roll of the dice, is $4 to $6 and includes a beer. Get all the details at Buntport's website or call 720-946-1388.

For more ways to rock the night and kill the day, go to westword.com/calendar.