Kenny Be's Worst-Case Scenario: Youth coaches changing the game of footbrawl

Categories: Comics, Sports

Recent news accounts from Eaton, Commerce City and Aurora, demonstrate that social behaviors and youth coaching practices are changing, and all will have a profound impact on the evolution of youth football...

Future Freshman Footbal Blog 1.jpg

#1. For starters, the customary coin toss, used to determine which team will kick off, is being replaced with a Coach's Ultimate Fighting Match. The winning coach determines if girls will be allowed to play in the game.

Look below to the new team uniforms for girls...

Future Freshman Football Blog 2.jpg

#2. Team uniforms for girls will follow the design standards set by the new Lingerie Football League -- not as objectification, but as a visual code to the acceptable (skin) and unacceptable (clothed) areas of female athlete tackle football contact.

Future Freshman Footbrawl Blog 3.jpg

#3. Coaches of the losing teams will be allowed to pair up teammates and demand post-game hand-holding laps around the field in an effort to cheer up distraught fans and to help build team spirit.

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