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Top Model's Nicole: Revenge of the soulless fetus

nicole smiling.jpg
This is what Nicole looks like when she wins. Suck on that, bitches.
It was a week of Mean Girls drama on last night's episode of America's Next Top Model, cycle thirteen, with Louisville's Nicole Fox eventually benefiting from some heavy-duty karmic payback. The episode opened with mannish-featured Leona Lewis lookalike Kara and previously sweet Sundai among the contestants sniping about Nicole, who was alternately described as lacking a soul and exhibiting "the social graces of a fetus" -- which means, I guess, that she's got a powerful jones for umbilical cords and amniotic fluid. But despite much mockery of her deadpan vocal delivery, she earned such strong marks during a reading that she was declared the winner of a go-see challenge, netting her some nice designer threads. And later, she absolutely killed in a photo shoot that required the wannabe models to wield martial arts weapons while in a wire harness that gives them the equivalent of diaper rash. (Warning: Desitin isn't a spermicide.)

During the judging sessions, guest evaluator Jessica White declared Nicole her favorite (just as Lauren Conrad did), and despite some mild knocks from Tyra Banks about showing too little personality, she wound up taking the number one spot -- her first victory after a slew of strong finishes. And the bottom two? Kara and Sundai, with Kara getting tossed. (Cue the blubbering.) Will Kara's fate stop the other women from ridiculing Nicole? Doubt it -- but Colorado's glorious freak keeps winning anyway.


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