Kenny Be's Worst-Case Scenario: Jake Jabs saves the day!

Categories: Kenny Be/Comics

As the Grand Marshal and chief sponsor, the American Furniture Warehouse owner will bring a fresh new look to the 2009 Parade of Lights...

Jake will lead the glittering festivities dressed as Santa Claus and will ride in a Florence Italian Leather Club Chair sleigh pulled by Rudolph, the red-nosed Bengal tiger.

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The festivities continue below:

Grandmaster Jabs will be followed by a pack of sugarplum salespeople who have dance degrees. They will replace their tutus with footstools and perform "Dance of the Ottoman Fairies."

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Musical entertainment will be provided by the citywide $290-Your-Choice-Rocker-Recliner Marching Band. They'll usher in the best selection of youth-bedroom-set floats that you can find anywhere!*

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