Chris Romer is the Lady Gaga of the mayor's race: Kenny Be's Speed Candidating

Speed Candidating Mail-in Ballot0.jpg

Ballots for the 2011 General Municipal Election are due on May 3, 2011. With less than a week left to vote and nine candidates running for Denver mayor, voters will need to keep a "cheat sheet" handy. My Speed Candidating profiles cut through the political song-and-dance to find the mayoral idol. Today, we look a political diva Chris Romer...

Chris Romer Speed Candidating Denver Mayor Election 2011 Kenny Be Westword Blog.jpg

As seen above, the Speed Candidating profile for Chris condenses the essence of the man and his mayoral mission. This abbreviated version is best understood when read in a side-by-side comparison with Speed Candidating profiles of the other eight mayoral candidates.

It is nearly impossible to compare Chris Romer's style to that of any other politician. However, for his keen sense of following trends and getting his face before the cameras to promote his career, Romer most resembles pop diva Lady Gaga. Yes, Romer loves the spotlight and can transform himself into the authority on any subject -- from I-70 expert to cupcake spokesmodel -- to fulfill his need for media attention. Romer's "cannonball" momentum keeps him so focused on the future that he sometimes forgets his past. According to his Westword mayor's race profile, he often neglects to mention that his father, Roy Romer was Colorado Governor for twelve years!

Although both quick change artists are known as "clothes horses," Lady Gaga and Chris Romer do part ways in the world of fashion. A careful look at Romer's campaign website reveals that the mayoral hopeful owns hundreds of blue button-collar shirts, which he wears to fiscal-sustainability and transportation-safety photo opportunities. He saves his single pink button-collar shirt to wear at education reform photo opportunities.

More from our Kenny Be/Comics archive: "Theresa Spahn is a breath of fresh air in the mayor's race: Kenny Be's Speed Candidating."


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5 comments
trickJames
trickJames

Vote for anyone but this douchebag.

Marcus Giavanni
Marcus Giavanni

Yea a man who was reelected as Colorado Senator, then after winning turns his back on his constituents to take a step down to be a Mayor?

What an ASS!

check this out http://www.whoisdestroyingdenv... there is an alternative but Denver's voters can't handle the truth... but they sure bitch about it..if you don't vote then don't bitch?

Guest
Guest

Romer is like a bull in a china shop -- recklessly breaking shit all around him, stinking it up, and leaving a big dung pile behind. Before he even opens his mouth he gives the impression of being an adversarial and pompous elitist. Upon opening his mouth all these impressions are confirmed.

Anyone but Romer. Please.

Nevermore
Nevermore

Chris is just a hollow shell of what his father was. Unfortunately the only skill he has is trying to get his name on everything. He'll never be half the man his father was.

Thedawg
Thedawg

Romer sucks.2nd generation politician. nothing more really needs to be said..

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