Top five pitches for John Hickenlooper and Michael Hancock to use on California businesses

Eat this, In-N-Out.

In a repeat of a trip he made with then-governor Bill Owens back in 2003, Governor John Hickenlooper is now winging his way to California. He and new Denver mayor Michael Hancock are officially trying to encourage businesses there to expand to Colorado -- and, unofficially, to maybe ditch the West Coast altogether. To help with their pitch, here are five reasons why California execs should choose the other four-syllable C state:

NPS Photo

Elk or sharks?

5. Colorado may not front an ocean, but we have a beach: the Great Sand Dunes. And who needs water filled with pesky sharks and pollution, anyway?

4. While California could disappear into that ocean if it's hit by more earthquakes, Colorado geography is relatively stable (if you ignore this year's quake by Trinidad, and earlier tremors caused by injection wells at Rocky Mountain Arsenal). And if California goes, look for more beachfront property here.

3. California may have 32 companies on the new Forbes top 100 list of America's Most Promising Companies, but we have No. 1: Smashburger.

2. In California, the feds are cracking down on medical-marijuana dispensaries. So far, though, they've been hands-off in Colorado. Because when this state's voters legalized MMJ, they did so in the constitution. Light up!

1. Even on days when the temperature doesn't drop forty degrees overnight, Denver is the coolest city in the country, according to the definitely uncool Brookings Institution.

Come to Coolorado!

More from the Calhoun: Wake-Up Call archive: "Occupy Trinidad has a hot idea for the cold months ahead."