Video: Sh*t people from Denver say

• Fun video and I'm obviously late to the party, but here are a few missing pieces. Any phrase preceded by the sentence stem: "As a Denver native I..." is sure to be filled with condescension and bullshit - and I should know, as a Denver native and all. We from Denver cant wait to tell visitors that, "In Denver we have an old saying, 'If you don't like the weather, wait five minutes". As if we are the only place where the weather changes and as if we invented the stupid saying. Every city I've ever been to uses this phase and thinks they invented it. We in Denver think its endlessly witty to refer to our friends in the shadow of the Flatirons as, "The People's Republic of Boulder". It stopped being original about the time Nixon left office. Washington Park must never be referred to as such - only "Wash Park". If you are a truly from Denver, you have no idea what the hell goes on in Northglenn and probably have never been to Thornton on purpose. And lastly, if you are truly from Denver you know that the new Elitch Gardens Six Flags whatever blows compared to the old Elitches. Further, you may be temped to utilize an acceptable alternative pronunciation: E-leeches.  <!-- /* Font Definitions */ @font-face {font-family:Cambria; panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4; mso-font-charset:0; mso-generic-font-family:auto; mso-font-pitch:variable; mso-font-signature:3 0 0 0 1 0;} /* Style Definitions */ p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal {mso-style-parent:""; margin:0in; margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:12.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} @page Section1 {size:8.5in 11.0in; margin:1.0in 1.25in 1.0in 1.25in; mso-header-margin:.5in; mso-footer-margin:.5in; mso-paper-source:0;} div.Section1 {page:Section1;} --> <!-- /* Font Definitions */ @font-face {font-family:Cambria; panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4; mso-font-charset:0; mso-generic-font-family:auto; mso-font-pitch:variable; mso-font-signature:3 0 0 0 1 0;} /* Style Definitions */ p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal {mso-style-parent:""; margin:0in; margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:12.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:Cambria; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} @page Section1 {size:8.5in 11.0in; margin:1.0in 1.25in 1.0in 1.25in; mso-header-margin:.5in; mso-footer-margin:.5in; mso-paper-source:0;} div.Section1 {page:Sect

• Coming from a Colorado native, I am sick to fucking death of all the queer-ass hipsters infesting this town; I mean what the fuck, could the floodgates of Boulder no longer hold them back? Pretentious faggots, every time I see one cruising around on their fixie (that's a cute bike dipshit, I had one just like it when I was a wee child, learn to use some fucking gears!) I just wanna run them down. I want all the worthless hipsters to move back to the cesspools they came from (Portland, Brooklyn, San Francisco, etc) and quit gentrifying neighborhoods.

• Lol Im a Nuyawka Who love Colorado and its peeps!

• The "hole" state? Are you sure? Maybe, like you said, it "if". It's difficult to argue in writing with someone who can't spell.

• "Hey look its Friday again, might as well drive up to the mountains and fuck up the roads for everyone who lives there!" .....(7 days later)...... "Hey wouldn't you know its Friday again!!!!!" and that's not just people from Denver, but the spores from the surrounding states as well... X0

• So true about scary Colfax with It's hookers and crack dealers. I've thought and said the same thing since I was kid.

• So those three other comments above that added so much to the conversation were taken down?  What a shame, good thing someone put them back up.

• You forgot that natives hate Texans... not the people just their attitude, 

• Or if you say "Im going up the hill"and you mean Evergreen or Vail.....

• I still call it the North Side, I can't bring myself to use its re-branding for gentrification.No one ever called it the Highlands when I was growing up there-- it was considered a little bit ghetto (the closer you got to the real ghetto--LoDo--the worst it was.) Old times-- Italians. Not so sure about any Scots . . .I think the name comes from its location to Downtown?  

• "Elway = God." "I knew Trey Parker in high school." "Cutler = the new Elway." "Cutler = sucks.  Good riddance." "Hell yeah!  Living the dream!" "My unemployment insurance is going to run out in four weeks so then I am really going to have to get some kind of job." "Venti with three shots and extra whip cream." "Orcut = the new Elway." "I need it for my chronic back pain, doc." "My kid is in the gifted and talented program." "Can I borrow some of your kid's pee?" Orcutt = sucks.  Good riddance." "If you wanted to get in this lane, you should have thought of it five miles ago." "Tebow = the new Elway." "Can you believe how bad the traffic was backed up on I-70 this weekend?  Never saw that coming!" "Another pitcher.  And can you put some more bacon and cheese on that?" "Okay, so maybe Tebow sucks, but don't say anything because ... you know ... God." "If you want to stop Californicating the Republic of Boulder, just wait five minutes." "Just a couple beers, ociffer." "Peyton Manning is going to play for the Broncos and be the new Elway." "I don't go on the trails.  It's not worth it unless you hike/ski/trek/ride/climb fifty miles into the back country." "All these damn steps.  I told you we should have brought your grandma's handicapped plates to the concert." "Wha?  Elway couldn't score us a Manning?  Elway sucks." "I'm not gonna say she asked for it, but she totally should not have put her face in that close to that dog."

• I totally agree, AgendaBuster. So tell me, what are you? Ute? Comanche? Arapahoe?

• It may originally have been called the Highlands, but seeing as you don't go around calling this town Denver City, you should know that names change, and calling it the Highlands these days is for bourgie fucks ripe for a tire slashing. Fuck this video, I agree with the Shit Hipsters Say commenter.

• We are all aware that all of you are "the shit". So go back to texas.

• Hi racist!

• The place just ain't the same without you, 666. Please reconsider!

• Go back to texas.

• People who hate hipsters are almost always hipsters.

• Woohoo! 

•  Who would want to try and live in Utah?

• Where's the line(s): "Denver is the new Austin!" "Denver is the new Seattle!" "Denver is the new Santa Fe!" "Denver has everything a real big city has...but with the mentality of a small town!" "Fuck L.A. people!" "Going to Coachella then off to Venice Beach!" "Are you at Sput?" "BINGO!" "The Beats used to hang here" "Hey! Give me 20 bucks!" "Hey! Call Detox for me!" "Hey! How do I get out of here!? And where are my keys!?" etc etc etc Crazy Love in the Mile High.

• What part of California are you from?

• This is a piss poor excuse for discussions and/or comments. All comments that insult people in Denver are taken off as soon as you leave the page. Too harsh for you pansy Coloradoans? I've left 3 comments regarding this video and all 3 have been removed. I hope I've made this comment non-insulting enough to be posted . . . . wimps (oh no I'm sure I'll be deleted again).

• Gee it seems like every comment I make gets dumped as being TOO HARSH for poor Coloradoans. What a bunch of dip sh*ts.

• Denver is full of assholes and idiots! The hole state if full of SH*T!

• FUCK YOU DENVER PIECES OF SHIT -  TAKE CALIFORNIA AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASSES!

•  you forget the medical marijuana dispensaries.

• Lots of good ones, Mandy Jo. Thanks.

• My favorite dive bar is on Colfax...

• It will always be "Mile High Stadium" to me.

• Smells like Greely, is it supposed to snow?

• Downtown Denver is a shithole, just bar's and shitty expensive places to eat. People piss & shit right out in public. Pedestrians & bicycles, clueless. If it wasn't for alcoholic consumption, it would be a ghost town! :)-

• Lived in Denver (Cap Hill) for the happiest 3 years of my life. If you think there's too many hipsters, try effing Portland. Douche/hipster capitol. Anyway, miss the Snug.... a lot.

• "Are you going to Panic at Red Rocks?"

• "I'll take one of those ones, one of these ones, and do those ones have green chile?" "Wanna go to Coors Lab?" "Go like 3 miles towards the mountains, take a right, then it's on the mountain side of the street." "Nice boards.  Did you get them at Sniagrab?" "Now YOU have a friend in the diamond business.  The Shane Company.  Just off Arapahoe Rd on Emporia St, a half mile east of I-25.  Open every night Monday through Friday 'til 8, Saturday and Sunday 'til 5."

• texans fuckin suck! we wouldnt hate on them if they just stayed in their damn state... or learned that they arent in their big loud state anymore and how to drive, remember people holding breaks is bad on an icy hill..

• Nope, Joyful, it's always been the Highlands, named after the Scots there were there before your sorry ass.  And if you ever picked up a book to read the history of North Denver, you would have known that.

• I've lived in Denver my entire life, no compelling reason to leave. I'm old enough to remember Owsley white lightning, Good Shepard's Home, and when rush hour was pretty close to an hour. @ Loves Denver, great comment

• Don't like the weather... wait five minutes!

• Right back at ya, Al. Thanks for the post.

• Love the post, 5th Horse. We're going to make it an upcoming Comment of the Day. Congrats.

• Good ones, Dawg. Thanks.

• "Cheyenne made a lot of friends at the dog park today!!!" "It took 2 and 1/2 hours to get back to Denver from Copper on Saturday" "The best pho is on Federal" "CRAP, I forgot my water bottle"

• Not transplant...suburbanite. If the address goes over 6000 in any direction, you'll start hearing teh scary stories of the frightening Fax!

• Why would they mention the ghastly visage of suffering and evil that welcomes passengers at DIA. If anything, locals put that up to SCARE OFF TRANSPLANTS AND TOURISTS. It has nothing to do with the locals, unless you work at the Airport...

• Remember, tell your friends, especially on the east coast. 

• Indeed we are. But we know where to hide the bodies if it comes to that.

• You totally forgot, "...but we need the moisture." 

• What's funny is that the Texans hate the Californians and the Californians hate the Texans.  What I want to know is what is up with all the Floridians?  I see more Florida plates than Texas and California plates now.  They must be running from the New Yorkers. The problem is not where people are from but the fact that they bring so much of their baggage and thier way of doing things with them.  They end up re-creating the hell holes they were trying to get away from in the first place. 

• quit hatin' on texans, we're the shit!!

• Well anytime, I'm happy to teach you some Colorado history. Sounds like you have a lot to learn! Let's hope you haven't been taught a bunch of bogus Texas history by bogus illegals trying to justify the takeover of the United States one baby at a time.

•  I agree. People who work at the Westword are the hippest cats in town.

• You forgot..... Your dog is part pitbull? /secretly calls the police

• True natives peak English? That's weird... Time for a history lesson, buddy.

• Interesting that you would call someone racist when the line before that refers to skin color...you racist.  I guess it takes one to know one.

• San Diegan here, love your city. For being so close to the stratosphere you sure are pasty. And you guys are really dorky, city hickish, and racist. But it's okay. I hate the drivers here too.

• People who hate hipsters are the new hipsters...

• Glendale Ballet.  Hur hur hur.    ::grin::

• "Oh, there's a leash law?  Yeah, I totally understand, but my dog is super friendly." "I'm traffic too!" says the cyclist weaving in and out of traffic. "Let's go sledding now, because the snow will be gone in the afternoon and then we can sit on the patio for happy hour. It's 2-1s at the Snug." "You live in Castle Rock? WHY?"

• Oh, do they?  I hadn't noticed then when I took a road trip to CA.

• All you dribbling "I hate Denver" snivelers, try living in Utah for a while--you'll move back here so fast your hipster glasses will fall off into the snow.

•  So if you really went to high school with those hookers and crack dealers, do you get an alumni discount on crack rocks and snooch?

• If this is supposed to be Denver's contribution to 'Sh*t People Say', (approved by Westword nonetheless) perhaps the production value and writing should have been more of a priority-- or at least noticed. Did anyone even look at this video before it was published?  Back to the drawing board!

• Ouch! Hope you're happy where you're at now, 666. Thanks for the post.

• Funny post, Mr. Dicker -- one we're going to make an upcoming Comment of the Day. Congrats.

• Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Joyfulgrrl.

• The majority of them work at Westword, so they must be hip, right? Thanks for the post, Jack.

• I lived in Colorado, in Denver for 15 years...the pow pow thing is right but mostly everything else sucked ass! Most things I ever hear my friends talk about is Snow boarding! You forgot about the big blue horse by DIA..re do!!!

• "I bought it during the housing market crash....no, the first one...." "The Bush Family fucked us with Silverado....no, not the movie..." "I went for a run on the parkway.....no, not the highway, that big wide median with all of the trees, grass, and dogshit...." "Take the Valley Highway, north......that's I-25, north...." "That smell?, the Stock Show is in town...."

• I think mentioning the constant road construction that has been going on for 20 years would have been at the top of my list. Coulda played up the MMJ stuff more too. Federal Blvd on Cinco de Mayo. Lakeside. The Stockshow. Added some people of different race... Denver IS diverse ya know.

• The key word here is SATIRE, people!

•  Lies. Lies and slander! Denver ladies give the best head---like they're trying to suck the green chile out of a breakfast burrito.

• True NATIVE Coloradoans: A. Hates Californians ( Except the women, 4 head ) B. HATE TEXANS ( Except the women, 4 head ) C. Know how to pronounce Arvada D. ---> Don't worry about the left lane In Town or on busy highways. We know the law! E. We Don't Litter in Colorado! That includes UnDocumented DIAPERS! F.And Most of All, We speak ENGLISH! So while you don't qualify for a NATIVE bumper sticker, you can leave your NAIVE sticker on your rear wheel drive Mustang as you return to the land of Fruit and Nuts.

• fucking lame! get out of denver dipshits

• Forgot "No Worries".

• Do you remember the "real" Elitch's?

• Not everyone in the video looks like a hipster......do they?  

• 17 years in a place you hate.  You should teach self motivation classes, there player. So I'm guessing by your shitty attitude that you must have moved back to Los Angeles where you belong.

•  At least California drivers know that the left lane is for passing.

• Denver is overrrr

• But you don't live here anymore, right? Cause we don't want you, honestly.

• ugh. So now shitty hipsters are considered representative of Denver? Shit like this makes me want to leave. 

• NOT FUNNY. Also most people in Colorado are from CA or somewhere else so native Coloradans are the MINORITY, B*******

• Boo on you Westword, this video is awful. The lack of Chicano flavor is so NOT Denver! This should be what Denver transplants say, or Denver hipsters say. You'll never hear natives say half this mess. Remember, it was the NorthSide before it was EVER the Highlands, bud!

• Yeah for sure, your dof is an untrained little ass hole..."oh he's a rescue"  so its all good

• I love Denver and the Westword but this video is fucking terrible.

• "All the good ethnic food is in Aurora." "I've never been to Littleton." "Parker, is that in Colorado Springs?" "Fuck you and your Native bumper sticker." "I need to get a Native bumper sticker."

• Typical ugly mountain people.  Horrible snow.  Limited economy.  Snobby people.  Denver sucks...lived in that hole for 17 years.

• You forgot to make dog references... Like " can I bring my dog there?" or "I don't like that place it's not dog friendly." or "my dog is a rescue dog."

• The 'Colfax is scary' line is definitely a transplant line. I went to high school with some of those hookers and crack dealers, they don't phase me :)

• not just cali drivers but those damn TEXANS and their four wheel slides.... If ya don't like the weather wait 15 minutes,,,,, 4 seasons in one day......

TotalComments: 91