Five guys Ken Salazar should offer to punch out
3. Cory Gardner. Well-lubricated by campaign donations from the oil and gas industry, Colorado's most pugnacious congressperson has been on Salazar's case for months, decrying the government red tape that supposedly hinders bold entrepreneurs (cf. Rex Tillerson, above) from drilling with abandon on public lands. He's also fuming over federal forest management and wild fires. (Here's a video of him unloading on some Salazar minions on that issue.) This feud might best be settled by a cage match in a blazing wilderness area, or maybe in a parking lot surrounded by a moat of smoldering crude oil.