Medical marijuana dispensary review: North Boulder Wellness Center

nbwc-front.jpg
Google Maps.
The recent floods in Boulder had one positive effect: The University of Colorado football game was canceled last weekend. I know it's selfish of me, but Boulder is much, much easier to get around without thousands of people masquerading as fans for a subpar college football team and using it as an excuse to get drunk.

Without the traffic, getting up to North Boulder Wellness Center from Denver was a (slightly humid) breeze.

North Boulder Wellness Center

1495 Yarmouth Ave.
Boulder, CO 80304
720-328-0118
NorthBoulderWellness.com

Hours: 11 a.m. to 7 p.m. Monday through Saturday, 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. Sunday.
Raw marijuana price range: $9-$13/gram $30-$40/eighth-ounce, $175-$225/ounce. Taxes not included in pricing.
Other types of medicine: shatter, hash, wax, edibles, tincture, lotions.
Online menu? Yes.
Handicap-accessible? Yes.

Beware: The MMC isn't the most obvious. I drove past it twice, assuming Siri and Google were conspiring to sidetrack me before realizing that the slate-roofed, pink retirement-condo-esque townhomes I was passing were actually businesses. Parking and entrances are in a lot behind the building.

northboulderwellnesssbudbar2.jpg
NorthBoulderWellness.com
The shop shares an entrance with what looks like a holistic healing center, though it's easy to figure out which is which when you walk in via the required locked entrance. I rang the buzzer and stood around for a minute while one of the women working the bud counter walked barefoot over to the door to let me in. There were two patients ahead of me, so I snagged a glass of water and took a seat in one of the two vibrating massage chairs on site.

The waiting room felt like the living room of pot dealers I used to use in the past. Not college-hippie pot dealers, but the post-graduate bachelors with nice apartments who sold pot on the side to supplement their income. All of the furniture felt like a single man had walked into an American Furniture Warehouse store with his credit card and walked out an hour later with his living room.

After about ten minutes of reading magazines while having my back artificially karate-chopped in the chair, it was my turn to head back through the arched doorway to the tranquil, roomy bud bar.

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Kandy Kush x Dark Star from North Boulder Wellness Center.
A long, black-wood-and-glass display case is set up around the space, with bud in the cabinet facing the door and accessories and vaporizers in the case to the right. Whompy electronic music thumped from a stereo nearby, echoing around the tall, angled ceilings. The space was lit solely by the huge windows, emphasizing the relaxed, Saturday-morning vibe of the place.

My budtender was a laid-back college student, happy to show me buds and offer her commentary on them -- which wasn't ever anything more than "That's one of my favorites" or "That's a good strain." Based on the center's menu of interesting genetics, a slant toward OG varieties and high marks online, I figured I was in for a treat.

Unfortunately, everything on the shelf I checked out looked like it was harvested prematurely or didn't get enough nutrients during flower. The strains had a light, fluffy appearance and the same dried-green-tea smell to them regardless of which of the three price tiers they were set at. No strain-distinct odors from cuts of OG Cheese, Power Kush, Trainwreck, Blue Dream, Kandy Kush x Dark Star, Hell's Angel's OG, OGer and other normally funkadelic strains. Total letdown.

Continue for the rest of the review and more photos.

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3 comments
Boulderpatient
Boulderpatient

This place is crap and I am shocked that they have 'rave' reviews online.  Don't waste your money at this place. The flood has nothing to do with the poor quality of product that they have been selling for years! 

BoulderResident
BoulderResident

With all the options available on the front range, I am curious as to why you would review an MMC in Boulder directly after the floods. Pretty much all of the businesses in this town were (and in many cases still are) reeling and off balance from the devastating losses and cleanup.  My business was decimated.  Many of my friends lost their homes.  People died here.  Why did that seem to be a good time to come to Boulder to do a review?  Just so you could avoid a little traffic?  A bit unfair and inconsiderate on your part in my opinion.

I've always liked and appreciated your reviews in general, Billy.  But having been a victim of the floods myself and witnessing the devastation and anguish that this town and our neighboring communities have gone through over the past 2 weeks, I find the timing of this review of a Boulder business to be particularly callous.  Your opening comments are remarkably shitty, launched at a community that just suffered $2 billion in property damage.  I'm so glad our pain and losses saved you 5 minutes on your commute, asshole.

I've been in North Boulder Wellness only a half a dozen times in the last 3 years (other MMC's are closer to me) but I have been very satisfied each time.  Their G-13 was particularly well done on my last visit. Other patients I know share my opinion, as reflected in the numerous high marks in online comments which you yourself referred to in the article.

I would hope at the very least that you give this center another review when all hell isn't breaking loose around their ears, if not an outright apology to them and the residents of Boulder for being so unconscious.

Monkey
Monkey

@BoulderResident Is this a joke? What does the flood have to do with the weed they have on their shelf? High marks on the internet is useless information, especially from weed stores. Have you ever been to a dispensary without "top shelf" weed that should have been left on the floor? I might think what you consider "well done" is not worth smoking, but the flood has nothing to do with that. If anything, and only if their grow was flooded, weed stores will have lesser quality months from now. Using the flood to explain why their weed sucks is remarkably shitty, and makes no sense. 

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