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Photos: Top ten U.S. cities for douchebags -- including two in Colorado


Number 4: Aurora, Colorado
douchiest.cities.aurora.colorado.jpg
If The Walking Dead is ever remade, and the zombies are swapped out for douchebags, the show will definitely be filmed in Aurora, Colorado. Locals must already hide in their homes to avoid the crowds of douchie men roaming the streets at night, easily spotted by their popped collars, True Religion jeans, and frosted tips. To avoid douchebags, consider moving to Denver, which ranks a respectable 73rd on our list.
Highest douchebag category ranking: Vin Diesel -- 4

Number 3: San Antonio, Texas

douchiest.cities.san.antonio.jpg
San Antonio would be the perfect city for Guy Fieri to launch a Benihana-style restaurant where diners cluster around deep fryers to eat overpriced fair food served by chefs in rodeo clown costumes. The meals would pair perfectly with a Bud Light Lime -flavored slushie served in an oversized fishbowl. It would be, to quote Fieri, "off the chain."
Highest douchebag category ranking: Vin Diesel -- 11

Continue to keep counting down the top ten U.S. cities for douchebags.


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258 comments
cynumber5
cynumber5

This piece seethes with hatred and INTOLERANCE for anything that doesn't comport with it's idea of trendy lefty stupidity. What happened to all that, "We believe in tolerance, diversity, and loooooooooove?"  Not if you disagree with them or dare to be, ohmygod..............Christian!  (I'm not, but apparently, bullying and vilifying Christians isn't intolerant at all.  It's merely what these brain-dead haters do in lock-step with one another.

-----Oh!!  And if this piece was written for humor, how come loony liberals don't have a sense of humor about any of their protective groups?  Can you say, hypocrite?

Kathy Wedzik
Kathy Wedzik

The meaning of douchebag please as the meaning has changed over the years.lmao

Lance916
Lance916

Forget Glendale, AZ...Scottsdale should be within the Top 5, if not within the top 2.

Heather Rosenberg
Heather Rosenberg

Lmao yeah I had no luck in aurora all I found was cheaters......

Nicholas Quinn Pike
Nicholas Quinn Pike

what was that? i couldn't understand you with all that cock in your mouth

Desmond Moon
Desmond Moon

My guess is that Nicky Pike here is doing his "best" to douche Ft Collins further up the list.

Desmond Moon
Desmond Moon

Ha. I do a far better job of clowning WestTurd "contributors" on a regular basis. You, on the other hand, are just a butthurt petulant little n00b clamoring for attention.

Alden Condict
Alden Condict

I thought maybe Fort Collins would make it on here...

Michael Sabin
Michael Sabin

Boulder may have been your douchiest! ! Just saying.....

Nicholas Quinn Pike
Nicholas Quinn Pike

please. i express more literary talent when i wipe my ass than westword has come up with in its entire existence. and what do you do there? blow all the "writers" while they sit around coming up with all this top notch journalism?

Desmond Moon
Desmond Moon

Southern Cali native, Boulder alum, and current Dallas resident: douchiness level off the charts

Desmond Moon
Desmond Moon

He's probably sitting outside their offices sulking away about STILL not being able to get a contributor gig.

Nicholas Quinn Pike
Nicholas Quinn Pike

actually I did the first time they posted this. They just spew bullshit faster than I can criticize it.

andrew595
andrew595

That picture is Atlanta, not Milwaukee. Just a heads up, editors.

Louis Lieb
Louis Lieb

How exactly do you define "douchebag", or is like the Supreme Court's definition of pornography: i.e. I know it when I see it?

Eliot Chaffee
Eliot Chaffee

Not sure how they came to this conclusion, as Westword is a local magazine.

Greg Hosack
Greg Hosack

Glendale...they must have never made it to Scottsdale or Tempe. There is way more douchebaggery going on there.

Anna Gingher
Anna Gingher

Push rude! Whatever! I have met only super nice people. We perhaps have angry douchey hobos!

Frank Lewis
Frank Lewis

I'm from Aurora and haven't lived there in 10 years but moving back next week. The place must've changed since I've been gone. Whatever, as long as the dbags stay outta my way

John Freer
John Freer

I think I'd like to see the authors definition of douchebag on this one. Having traveled extensively over the past 20 years of my career, I find the highest concentrations of elitist douchebags in places like San Francisco, LA, and Houston. The selections in this article make no sense to me.

Magick Arnett
Magick Arnett

Trenton, NJ only because of the jersey shore fucks

Alex Elsberg
Alex Elsberg

What about the whole states of Florida and New Jersey?

Kevin Roupp
Kevin Roupp

Scottsdale, AZ Denver (LoDo & LoHi) Hackensack, NJ Jacksonville, FL CO Springs, CO Boulder, CO Summerlin, NV The Whole Valley area, CA Tempe, AZ Dallas, TX

James Gill
James Gill

As a native of San Antonio, I have to rise in defense of my hometown. The vast majority of the guys described in the San Antonio entry are actually transplants from southern California. I'm not kidding. Even a little.

Nicole Savarese
Nicole Savarese

Madeline Hicks Lowry north didn't make the cut were too busy sitting in our hot tub drinking cosmos by the picters.

Vito John Marzano
Vito John Marzano

Capital*. The "Capitol" is the building that houses the legislature.

Samuel Walter
Samuel Walter

I'm quite sure all of the top ten cities for douche bags are in New Jersey. As a proud New Yorker, I can attest to the fact that the entire state of New Jersey is overwhelmingly comprised of douche bags.

Sam Chapman
Sam Chapman

Aurora should have been number one. I think there is a mandatory class on how to be a douche when you buy or rent a house in Aurora.

Charlene McCune
Charlene McCune

No surprise regarding Colorado Springs... but Aurora?

cynumber5
cynumber5

You know damn well why!  Because leftie Westword wraps it's "tolerance and diversity" in hatred for anything Christian or conservative.  They are full of hate and ridiculous generalities, all to suit their twisted view of the world.

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