Sex scandal sheriff Terry Maketa apology video, alternative subtitles version

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More photos below.
El Paso County Sheriff Terry Maketa is admitting he's been a bad, bad boy. After he was targeted with allegations about improper relations with several women on his staff, not to mention promotions based on sexual favors, the county commissioners unanimously passed a vote of no confidence. But he has no plans to resign, and this weekend, he sent employees a video obtained by the Colorado Springs Gazette in which he mixed apologies with statements about his intention to serve out his term.

The clip is of such dubious quality that the Gazette has added subtitles that make the results even more awkward -- and they've inspired us to come up with subtitles for the other subtitles revealing what Maketa may have been thinking. Look below to check out the strange results, followed by the original video.
What he may have been thinking: "I tried to get out of it, but my wife made me."
What he may have been thinking: "Has anyone seen my pants?"
What he may have been thinking: "I've seen this work for criminals before, so I thought I'd give it a try."
What he may have been thinking: "Yep, you guessed it. I'm not going anywhere."
What he may have been thinking: "By 'better,' I mean better at the good behavior stuff. I'm already excellent at bad behavior."

Continue for more of the Sheriff Terry Maketa apology, alternative subtitles version.

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DonkeyHotay topcommenter

The citizens of Colorado Springs DESERVE a scumbag like controlling law enforcement.

Alec Revelle
Alec Revelle

When you are a high profile public figure you are held to a higher standard, that comes with the job and I think I have a right to say this as one who works for the Federal government. He should resign, he is an embarressment to the department and has disgraced his office. He is also a raving egomanic so dont count on him resigning.

Robb Pierce
Robb Pierce

Recall this jagoff! Total abuse of power/position!

DonkeyHotay topcommenter

Put the corrupt scumbag in prison where he belongs.

muhutdafuga topcommenter

While I wish you were correct, a high profile or wealthy figure is held to a MUCH LOWER standard.  Corruption is expected and excused among the "elite."  If I were to punch a 7-11 clerk and steal a meal, I'd be having my meals in jail.  When Dickless Cheney helps start a war based on lies and is directly responsible for the death of MANY MANY MANY thousands of innocents, he walks away with $100 milliion from operation make-a-buck and is not prosecuted.

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