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Gregory Gauna, Accused DIA Scrooge, Busted for Stealing Woman's Xmas Gift Cards

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Gregory Gauna. Additional photos, a video and more below.
Is Gregory Gauna a thief? A schmuck? Or a combination of the two? These burning Schmuck of the Week questions are prompted by Gauna's arrest for swiping $1,250 in gift cards intended as Christmas presents -- or did he simply "find" them?

See also: Andres Sanchez-Luevano After Allegedly Killing GF's Kitten: "That's What You Get, Bitch"

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Andres Sanchez-Luevano After Allegedly Killing GF's Kitten: "That's What You Get, Bitch"

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Andres Sanchez-Luevano. Additional photos and more below.
Animal cruelty goes beyond mere schuckiness in our book. But we're featuring Andres Sanchez-Luevano as a Schmuck of the Week anyhow due to his alleged reasons for killing a month-old kitten -- he was apparently trying to punish his girlfriend of three years -- and his initial decision to rabbit rather than face the consequences. The arrest report and more below.

See also: Nathen Channing Faces Misdemeanor Despite "Felony Stupid" Banana-Pointing Move

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Nathen Channing Faces Misdemeanor Despite "Felony Stupid" Banana-Pointing Move

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Nathen Channing on the other end of a banana. More photos plus videos below.
Frankly, we don't know which of the people in our latest Schmuck of the Week post deserves the honor more: the guy who pointed a banana at two deputies, the law enforcers who arrested him or the prosecutor who decided to pursue charges in the case, albeit lower ones than originally envisioned. But whoever's the schmuckiest, we love this story! Get the hilarious photo-and-video-aided details below.

See also: Steven Paula Busted for Road Rage Punchout After His Daughter Posts Video on Snapchat

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Steven Paula Busted for Road Rage Punchout After His Daughter Posts Video on Snapchat

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Pics are from Fox31 coverage. More photos and a video below.
A note to teenagers who think they need to post Every Single Thing on social media: It's probably not a good idea to share a video of your dad punching someone out -- because it could end with him going to jail, and becoming our latest Schmuck of the Week.

Which brings us to the story of Steven Paula.

See also: Jeremiah Proctor's Schmucky Samurai Sword Attack on the Anti-Schmuck

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Jeremiah Proctor's Schmucky Samurai Sword Attack on the Anti-Schmuck

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Jeremiah Proctor. More photos and a video below.
This week at Schmuck of the Week HQ, we've got a yin/yang situation. Or maybe we said say Schmuck/Anti-Schmuck, since the man Jeremiah Proctor allegedly tried to slice up with a samurai sword for the sin of towing his improperly parked car has responded in decidedly unschmucky fashion.

See also: Brock Butson Gets 192 Years for Making Bank Robbery (and Meth?) a Family Affair

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Brock Butson Gets 192 Years for Making Bank Robbery (and Meth?) a Family Affair

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Brock Butson. More photos below.
From our time on the Schmuck of the Week beat, we've learned that schmucks often have the ability to spread their schmuckiness to those around them -- including members of their own family. By this measure, Brock Butson is a schmuck supreme, since he not only managed to earn a jail sentence measured at just shy of two centuries, but with his help, his two sons are serving jolts behind bars as well.

See also: Michael Kaneta, Child Enticer, Allegedly Tricked Moms Into Taking Kids to "Charity" Photo Shoot

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Michael Kaneta, Child Enticer, Allegedly Tricked Moms Into Taking Kids to "Charity" Photo Shoot

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Michael Kaneta. More photos below.
Sex offender/child enticer Michael Kaneta certainly appears to have come up with a clever scheme to convince moms to let him take snapshots of their kids: posing as a photographer for a charity calendar. But does he deserve credit for coming up with this unusual gambit? No! No! A thousand times, no -- as you'll understand when you see details and more below.

See also: John William Bell Allegedly Went to the Dogs to Steal Morphine

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John William Bell Allegedly Went to the Dogs to Steal Morphine

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John William Bell. More photos below.
If investigators are right, John William Bell likes morphine and other heavy-duty narcotics so much that he was willing to do almost anything to get them, including lying, forgery and throwing an acquaintance to the dogs, in a manner of speaking -- because one of the crime scenes in the long-running case was an animal hospital.

See also: Jack Gardner, Cop, Charged With Spoiling Sting of Man Seeking Underage Kink/Bondage Girl

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Jack Gardner, Cop, Charged With Spoiling Sting of Man Seeking Underage Kink/Bondage Girl

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Jack Gardner. Additional photos and more below.
Did Jack Gardner, a longtime detective with the Boulder Police Department, warn a child-luring suspect in advance to prevent him from becoming ensnared in a sting operation? Prosecutors think so, and if they're right, Gardner has definitely landed in schmucky territory. We've got photos, details about the man Gardner's accused of helping (he wound up getting busted anyhow), and the arrest affidavit that led to charges against the detective and his subsequent resignation from the force.

See also: Joseph Ellsworth, Ex-Denver Cop Turned Sex Offender: Attempted Child Sex Assault Bust

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Kelsey Pratt and Trevor Morley Learn Breck Parties Harder Than Gettysburg

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A Facebook photo of Kelsey Pratt. More photos below.
Kelsey Pratt and Trevor Morley are from Breckenridge, a town that knows how to party. Whether the same can be said about the area in and around Gettysburg, Pennsylvania, we frankly don't know. But there appears to have been a disconnect when Pratt and Morley visited there, with the result being schmucky parting gifts no one really wants: a matching set of mug shots.

See also: Brandon Hansen May Have Taken Video of You at Denver Pavilions -- But Not of Your Face

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