Doug Lamborn's shmucky tantrum results in a sorry state of the union

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It probably shouldn't have been a surprise that Doug Lamborn, Republican congressman from Colorado Springs, decided to boycott President Obama's State of the Union Address on Tuesday. Lamborn, after all, is the same guy who referred to Obama's economic and debt-reduction policies as a "tar baby" in July. (Oops, guess, the historically racist significance of that expression escaped Lamborn, who was named Keith Olbermann's Worst Person in the World that week.) But it was surprising nonetheless.

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Denver's Civil Service Commission should be fired along with bad cops

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Alex Landau.
There's not much a Denver cop can't do on the job these days. He can beat men without provocation, mace women for fun, disobey orders, and lie to his superiors and the public. It's all good. It's just cops being cops, right? That's the apparent position of the Civil Service Commission, which hears disciplinary cases involving cops and firefighters. Over the past two months, the commission has reinstated six Denver officers who had been fired for committing at least one, and in some cases, all of the above transgressions.

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Tom Menino, Colorado beer-hating Boston mayor, puts the "uck" in shmuck

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Tom Menino.
Boston mayor Tom "Mumbles" Menino thinks Colorado beer sucks. He thinks Boston beer is better. Yeah, you heard that right.

On Thursday, Menino made headlines after Denver mayor Michael Hancock suggested that the two make the traditional sudsy bet over the outcome of the Denver Broncos vs. New England Patriots playoff game tomorrow. "We have the best," he reportedly said. "Colorado Rocky beer? Uck."

Wow, talk about pulling a Buckner.

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Alexandra McLean, Englewood drama teacher, mounts shmucky show for teen -- in her car

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When Alexandra Elizabeth McLean was hired last summer to take over as the new drama teacher at Englewood High School, she probably wanted to make her mark. After all, she was replacing a guy who had been there for three decades before retiring.

She did -- by banging one of her students after the big production, police say.

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Drunken speeding is no reason to be fired, says ex-cop Derrick Saunders

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The Denver Police Department has had a difficult time firing bad cops over the past few years. And while the Department of Safety finally made some headway in 2011, it still has issues.

For example, when Derrick Curtis Saunders was canned earlier this month, a whopping eighteen months after he was busted driving 143 miles per hour in a 55-mph night...while drunk, it seemed like a good move. Late, but good.

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Who will make Westword's 2011 Hall of Shame?

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This guy made the cut last year.
Colorado certainly withstood its share of shmucks, scoundrels and scumbags in 2011, from poorly-behaved celebrities to douchebags in parking lots to public servants and politicians who made us cringe. And you can find their stories in our Shmuck of the Week archives. But the lowest of the low are inducted each year into Westword's Hall of Shame. And we certainly had a lot of characters to choose from. Who made the cut? Find out tomorrow when we reveal our 2011 Hall of Shame class. Need a teaser?

Well, then, check out our class from 2010 and some previous years.

Rod "Blago" Blagojevich, shmuck -- for trying to work the prison system like he did politics

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Rod Blagojevich, the disgraced former Illinois Governor who's headed to prison for trying to broker a political deal, is now trying to broker another. Blago, who was sentenced to fourteen years in the clink for trying to sell the U.S. Senate seat vacated by Barack Obama (among other forms of corruption), would like to do his time in Colorado's dry and sunny climes at the FCI Englewood prison.

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Brooke Mueller, Shmuck: Will she out-Charlie Sheen her ex in Aspen?

Brooke Mueller.
It can't have been easy to be married to Charlie Sheen: Tiger Blood just isn't the basis for a happy union. But that doesn't excuse Brooke Mueller for her #winning cocaine arrest last weekend near the Belly Up in Aspen -- the scene of another Shmucky episode just two week ago -- or her excuse to the cops that she was trying to "impress her friends." According to the Aspen Times, that's what Mueller, a 34-year-old "actress" who married Sheen in 2008 and had his twins in 2009, told police when they allegedly found her holding four grams of Aspen's other white powder.

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Pat Sullivan's fall from sheriff to shmuck makes for a disturbing story

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Pat Sullivan.
The sad, weird and increasingly shocking case involving former Arapahoe County Sheriff Patrick J. Sullivan -- whose name adorns the jail there -- has dominated the headlines this week. And it's likely to get even more bizarre. Essentially, the story is this: Sullivan, 68, a well-respected lifelong lawman and onetime National Sheriff of the Year, was arrested on Tuesday and charged with trading methamphetamine to an Aurora man in return for sex.

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Zeds Dead, but the band's biggest fan, Asa Robinson, is a shmuck

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Asa Robinson really really, REALLY, REALLY wanted to go to the Zeds Dead concert in Aspen last Tuesday, so badly, in fact, that police say he called in a bomb threat to the concert venue after he couldn't buy tickets to a sold-out show. The goal of the bomb threat, it appears, wasn't to exact retribution on Belly Up Aspen, however, or to make all of the people who did have tickets suffer -- as he did, according to the Aspen Times.

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