My flight back to DIA last night from an extended Thanksgiving vacation was remarkably stress-free. I was flying United, which always makes me nervous (This is the airline, after all,  that once stranded me in Spartanburg, South Carolina, with a $15 meal voucher and a Best Western room with no hot water. Westword has documented plenty of other horror stories, too). But last night, I was pleasantly surprised to find my flight on time, the airline attendants cheerful, and the ride smooth and snow-free.

The only downfall was my seat-mate, the requisite Drunk Guy on the Plane. As he squirmed  into the chair beside me, reeking of that stale mouthwash-and-sweat perfume so popular with homeless guys at bus stations, he informed me that yes, he had made a stop at the airport bar before boarding. I politely began breathing through my mouth and opened a book to ignore him, certain that he would be asleep in minutes. Which he was, face-first on his tray table.

It’s October, and I keep meaning to bring my kids to a corn maze. But I haven’t so far – what with the economy and all. Anyway, earlier this month, I had to take a last-minute trip to California for a family emergency and encountered a maze of a different sort.

The airline fee maze. Here is a list of fees I encountered:

Woe is the traveler this summer who flies for business or pleasure. As gas prices have gone through the roof, the airlines have responded by taking it out on passengers, raising ticket prices, adding fees for checked bags, canceling routes and charging for food.

As a result, Westword decided to begin Part 2 of a contest we first ran eight years ago asking people to describe how United Airlines in particular had ruined their summer vacations. This time, we expanded our target to the entire airline industry.

Have a complaint? A horror story like these? Still trying to reclaim lost baggage, missing vouchers or lost dignity? If so, e-mail us at editorial@westword.com or post your thoughts here. The best bad tale wins a free trip -- on Amtrak.

But first, read the submission below. -- Jonathan Shikes

Woe is the traveler this summer who flies for business or pleasure. As gas prices have gone through the roof, the airlines have responded by taking it out on passengers, raising ticket prices, adding fees for checked bags, canceling routes and charging for food.

As a result, Westword decided to begin Part 2 of a contest we first ran eight years ago asking people to describe how United Airlines in particular had ruined their summer vacations. This time, we expanded our target to the entire airline industry.

Have a complaint? A horror story like this one? Still trying to reclaim lost baggage, missing vouchers or lost dignity? If so, e-mail us at editorial@westword.com or post your thoughts here. The best bad tale wins a free trip -- on Amtrak.

But first, read the submission below. -- Jonathan Shikes

The airline industry is giving flyers fits this summer as the big carriers raise ticket prices, add fees for checked bags, cancel routes and charge for food. United, American, US Airways, even Denver-based Frontier are making it difficult to sit back, relax and enjoy our summer vacations.

Eight years ago, Westword held a contest asking people to describe how United had ruined their summer vacations. It's high time we do so again — but this round, we're expanding our target to the entire airline industry.

Have a complaint? A horror story like this one? Still trying to reclaim lost baggage, missing vouchers or lost dignity? If so, e-mail us at editorial@westword.com or post your thoughts here. The best bad tale wins a free trip -- on Amtrak. -- Jonathan Shikes

But first, read the submission below from one unhappy flyer:

United Airlines. It’s the company Denver loves to hate, the one that has caused sky-high stress levels and unhappiness for an untold number of fliers, the company many of us have no choice but to use since it dominates the gates at Denver International Airport.

The latest insult? Charging $15 to check a bag (your second suitcase cost another $25). It’s so annoying that United earned Westword’s Shmuck of the Week designation for doing so.

Back in August 2000 -- before gas prices spiked, before 9/11 – Westword ran a contest called “How United Airlines Ruined My Summer Vacation” that asked readers to submit stories about their worst experiences in the Friendly Skies. The winner won two roundtrip tickets on Frontier, Denver’s homegrown airline.

United has more excuses these days, but that doesn’t change the fact that the airline still ruins a lot of summer vacations and travel in general (For a sad Thanksgiving story, click here.)

Our latest story again comes from one of our own. You can read it below, and be sure to buckle your seatbelt, then click on the link above to check out our eight-year-old contest: