The 10 best David Sedaris quotes from last night's lecture, presented free of context

5. "In my day, our parents put us to bed with two simple words: 'Shut up.'"

4. "She told me she owns two Komodo dragons."

3. "You don't ever want to hear 'pray' from a flight attendant."

2. On the house that he and boyfriend Hugh Hamrick would have loved to purchase in England: "Hugh got online and found a house called Faggot Stacks, and it was located between the villages of Balls Cross and Titty Hill."

1. "I told her I was conducting a little poll, and I asked, 'Have you ever shit in your hand?'"

For more Sedaris-like quotes, see the entries in our recentDavid Sedaris ticket contest.
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5 comments
Scar65
Scar65

David Sedaris is brilliant.

Amanda Kay Canupp
Amanda Kay Canupp

David Sedaris and I actually did talk about shitting in your hand. I told him about the raft you have to make to hide the poo. This was back when he was in Orlando on October 30th. But he was amazing!

Nfocus85
Nfocus85

These are hilarious, the only issue I had wad that 'kimodo' was misspelled. The correct spelling is Komodo. 

Kelsey W.
Kelsey W.

Fixed, thanks for pointing it out!

Guest2
Guest2

note that while brilliant choices.....not completely free of context..... 

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