From a Colorado native to a transplant: Your altitude problem is my attitude problem

Categories: Breeality Bites

CONative.jpg
I'm not just a native, I'm also an asshole.
I was complaining via that modern adult whiny message board known as Twitter recently that the only people who like John Denver are non-natives. I also blame those same anonymous people for Denver's traffic, gentrification, the popularity of days-long dubstep shows at Red Rocks (and the sickening popularity of any band qualified as "hippie shit" that books and sells out several dates in a row at that venue) and the influx of cruiser bike riders (which I should acknowledge we are both for and against here at Westword).

Maybe some people born in Colorado do like John Denver, but I'm sticking to my blanket statement that we really don't. I mean, he's not even from here (though neither is John Hickenlooper, and I love that guy), and people who aren't from here don't really know Denver -- as a city, anyway. They know it as a place that's "finally getting a Trader Joe's!", not the first city where Target opened stores outside of its Minneapolis headquarters in 1966.

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- Smoking at Paramount Cafe and 86'd from Coyote Ugly: Happy birthday, 16th Street Mall

I'm not sure why I feel like I have the authority to be snotty to someone because they may or may not have moved here from Texas/California/Vermont for incentives like beautiful weather and a reasonable housing market. But I find myself saying things like "

H2Obuilding1.jpg
Is that an apartment building or a water ride?
I get angry when I see a gorgeous mid-century building turned into a Pilates studio or, God forbid, a dull but well-constructed box structure in Capitol Hill become another Boutique Apartments project. To me, there is no kitschy attraction to painting an apartment complex toilet-bowl blue and grafting a giant, novelty water spout to the side of it and calling it the "H2O." It looks like the design equivalent of an STD. But that's progress, I suppose.

It's not so much that I dislike people not from here -- obviously a large percentage of my friends, co-workers and even family weren't born in my fair-square state -- but sometimes, my pride just gets in the way. If someone blames the altitude for the reason they feel sick, I laugh at them. Altitude sickness isn't real -- those of us born and raised here know that.


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9 comments
plpllawson
plpllawson

Denver is not your grandfathers Denver anynore. 

When Stapleton closed down it immediately killed what was the small town Denver area metroplex and the extraordinary environment of the front range  and turned it into the long awaited greedy real estate developers dream which will destroy it.

As Jethro Tull sang, 

God stole the handle andThe train won't stop going --No way to slow down.

Cognitive_Dissident
Cognitive_Dissident topcommenter

Nothing like being proud of something you didn't do yourself.

phatherphoton
phatherphoton

I'm sure glad that my identity is not based on decisions my parents made before I existed.  Rather than reveling in ignorant tribalism, I take pride in the fact that I, as an adult, CHOSE Colorado to be my home.   The first 3 blissful years, which were over 21 years ago, were spent living at 10,200', so I certainly have no altitude problem!  Back then I had a license plate holder that said: "California by birth, Colorado by choice".

HPrynne
HPrynne

@westwordculture Not an asshole.Your just protective of your home town and wary of unworthy interlopers. Keep up the good work.

Gilbilly
Gilbilly

Altitude Sickness is a real thing.  It might not happen @ 5280ft. but it certainly happens at higher elevations.  I am a transplant but I can understand the native sentiment.  A bunch of people realized how nice Colorado is and decided to move here and in the process changed things, some for better, some for worse, just like how your parents or grandparents moved here and did the same thing.  I guess the trick is to appreciate the good things that have changed as much as lamenting the bad.

Cecil
Cecil

Well, this is some dull wankery.

jack
jack

People that go around touting they are colorado natives are usually self-centered, arrogant young white kids that feel entitled and think their opinions matter more than their peers.  Get over yourselves!

jennikoa
jennikoa

Thankfully most Natives don't share these sentiments. I'm a native and I embrace a lot of what is happening in Denver and Colorado. It is not decreasing the joys of living here in any way. And I welcome newcomers! The type of people this place draws are generally progressive, open-minded, outdoorsy, beer-loving folk seeking a life in a beauitful environment. It's not their fault they weren't born here. Why all the hate?

lodo16
lodo16

C'mon, what's the point??

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